Friday, November 30, 2007

BAD DAY!!!

Went 2 sch 2 get back my laptop today. Still not feelin' gd…. n I'm gettin' tired of sch. Dropped my sup an email, asked when he wld be able to finish readin' my papers, I m tired of fightin' this war alone all by myself, n this isn't the 1st time!! Chatted online wif my French friend in Aust, Tudo. He asked me to quit n come bk to Aust…. i dunno!!

N can ya believe this? Dan came n looked for me today. I dunno wat he wanted, he was kinda eccentric n inebriated today. He accused me of snatchin' away Zhangli, he accused me of betrayin' him… etc etc. Come on, before ya brought in a verdict of smthin', ya should at least gif me a trial, let me haf a chance to know wat was goin' on n explain!!!! I was bewildered n
1st: I dunno wat was goin' on n he didn't bother 2 explain.
2nd: I did not snatch away Zhangli n she is always there for him or anyone.
3rd: Zhangli is always my gd friend n I've no feelin' 4 her. We r mutual friends!!
4th: Everyone n even Zhangli herself knows it well tat I only like G3 although she'll never know n we can never be together. :(
5th: I was the one tat intro Zhangli 2 him durin' the rehearsal, n now he blamed me 4 everythin'....!?!??
6th: I m not in a gd mood lately either, pls dun bother me abt this!! Whoever ya wan jus go 4 it!!!

Dan if ya read this, pls i jus wanna elucidate myself n i m not angry with ya. Zhangli if ya read this, pls dun take it to heart 2, i reckon this is jus a misunderstandin'. I dun wish 2 lose any of ya!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Last day of invigilator duty

Finished my last invigilator duty this mornin'.... so tired!! My laptop is down AGAIN... haf sent for repair!! PC show on Thur (tomorrow) at Expo, i shall go n haf a look. Today happened 2 see this pic of Paris Hilton online. Yes she's so gorgeous. Rem the tv series "The simple life" with Nicole Richie? She is a model, actress, musician n businesswoman... wow... imagine tat? However jus a couple of mths back she was sentenced to over 20 or more days in jail for some alcohol-related reckless drivin' charges, fr wat i rem. Hope she's fine now.

The comin' friday we r havin' a mps dinner or party (not too sure... either one). Nevertheless i'll not be goin' by givin' an excuse tat i wun be able to make it on time. I dun really know why i dun wanna go too, i jus dun feel like goin'. I m not in a really gd mood lately... n i dun wanna pretend to be happy on tat day. I'll miss these ppl n i jus hope they'll haf an enjoyable time. :)

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Poor old couple askin' 4 mercy

Yesterday there was an old couple who came 2 Mr Teo 4 help regardin' their son. The husband was visually impaired. However due 2 some rules n regulations they were not allow 2 come...! Vincent even had an argument with them not allowin' them to stay. Nevertheless i was moved by this parental love n decided 2 help them mulishly. I wrote everythin' 4 them n helped 2 type it out personally. I thought i was helpin' them this way n didn't listen to Vincent, in fact i was wrong 2 give them a false hope. Although they weren't allow to see Mr Teo, they insisted to stay behind 2 wait for him to finish readin' the letter n see if he cld see them 4 a min. After waited for 4.5 hrs, Mr Teo refused to see them. I felt very sorry n guilty. The agin' couple was supremely upset n in tears. I know the feelin' of havin' false hopes is dismal n pathetic. I m sorry.... i dunno wat 2 do.... i jus feel distressed n useless 2 by this matter.

Reached sch at 8, my invigilator duty was at 8.30. So early n was soooo bored in the exam hall for 2 hrs+.... walkin' ard...

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Hallucination

Today walked pass the luver's bridge... it's always so beautiful to me... maybe jus my hallucination again. Time flies... n i can't turn bk time... though i wish i cld. I miss donuts too.... those i didn't really bear 2 finish. Life is really nothin' but jus memories. Ppl n things jus come n go, the word "eternality" is only used to describe God n not humans.

It was rainin' when i was saunterin' bk hm today n i had an umbrella wif me. But guess wat? I gave it to a lady on my way bk, n i pretended i was jus stayin' at tat blk when she asked. When i told Dan abt this... his 1st response was "she must be gorgeous". Haha... i didn't ans him anyway. But i wanna help her sorely becos of these reasons:
1) She carried quite some stuffs with her n were kinda wet 2.
2) I wasn't in a hurry n was headin' bk hm, didn't really mind gettin' wet.
3) She wasn't too young, quite dangerous when i saw her runnin' fr one shelter 2 another.

Do ya only help/talk 2 someone if he/she is attractive? If so then i'll understand why noone really wanna help/talk 2 me. :( N i told my mum abt this too n she went like "Wat? I dunno wat 2 say abt ya again!!" Yes i've long been denounced as over soft-hearted in the family. My mum said tat b4 - if my sista and I cld be added up n divided by 2 (gettin' average), it wld be perfect. Haha... yes my sista's callousness is kinda cool n lotsa guys cldn't put up wif her 2.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Melancholy mood!!

I rem the last time i was in depression G3 was here (online) to console me. Imagine wat happened to me concurrently at tat time, my laptop went down, followed by my external harddisk the next day. Tat was bad as i wld lose all my impt data. I lost my mobile phone, violin, injured my finger, n even went for operation near my eye (a very minor one but was still quite worried). After talkin' 2 G3, i somehow felt better.... i cldn't believe it too.

These few days i was quite depressed bcos of some sch matters. My progress is ok so far but i m really really tired.... jus no strength to move on n feel like givin' up. I m also quite disappointed with some profs n the politic 2 which i dun wanna explain it here. Talked to Desmond n some friends abt it. We agree tat livin' a simple life wld be better, e.g., workin' 8-5, havin' fun durin' the weekends etc. I've no life... been like at wars since i got bk 2 Singapore abt 2 yrs ago n started sch... i'm worn out.

One of my best friends in Aust Gaetan is visitin' Singapore in Feb 2008. Lookin' forward to it.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Presentation to panel members!

Today i presented to the panel members, 4 profs includin' my own sup. Was kinda overwhelmed by 2 profs' ques.. .n jus as wat my prof explained (to me only) "They were indeed really picky but if there was no comment at all... then my work wld be too perfect n i wld haf grad!" The other 2 profs were really nice guys includin' my sup. Initially i was kinda despondent by some of their ques... but come to think of it, its really gd 2 receive comments which helped me to think a step further. I know there r some directions tat i should n should not look/step into. In fact i should be thankful. They commented tat i was tryin' to do too much things... which was a bad idea. Quite true too...! :( Sigh.... out of sudden feelin' so hopeless.

I rushed bk hm after presentation. My little cousin was waitin' for me at home. He called me twice askin' when i wld be back.... soooo cute!! He called me on the phone"Where r ya now?" n i ans "On the train headin' home". He asked "Which train (he means which station)? Pasir ris?" Then i ans "No, clementi"... hahhaaa... hilarious!! At least smthin' 2 perk me up today! :)

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Right here waitin'

I rem i casually played this song on piano durin' a rehearsal n the ppl (mostly my friends) luv it. Yes its one of my favorite songs 2. I attached the lyrics below.

Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain
If I see you next to never
How can we say forever
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
I took for granted, all the times
That I thought would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now
Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' CrAzY
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance
Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' cRaZy
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

Saturday, November 10, 2007

fooled by one of my best friends!

Haf ya ever been fooled by a gd friend which made ya feel really downhearted? I dun wish 2 list it here as i jus wanna rem the happy/ phenomenal moments in my life n rebuff those unhappy ones. The person even compared G3 with some of the gals which really pissed me off!! Wat it gotta do wif G3??? I m totally annoyed!!!

And bad things jus happen consecutively. Last nite Jiahui was kinda unhappy wif me. He msged me online at 1am askin' me 2 join him 2 get some xmas stuffs in the mornin' 9.30am. I've prepared 2 spend the day at home doin' my work, n i'm presentin' 2 a panel of ppl next week, etc etc. I explained 2 him n he wasn't 2 happy though. He argued "i dun think a few hrs will affect yr work rite?" Yes i cld jus rush bk asap after gettin' the stuffs... but i m totally not in the mood 2 shop for watever xmas stuffs or goin' anywhere... whereas i m havin' lotsa work on hand. I asked him 2 ask Shereen but she cldn't make it too. He was quite unhappy n logoff wif a "nvm, gdnite". I feel really sorry too n i hope he wun blame me for gd.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

bizarre incidences

Few bizarre things happened lately. Few weeks ago (2 or 3 weeks) my mobile phone n my digital camera went on strike concurrently. I tried several routines, on n off, changed sim n memory card etc etc... they jus refused 2 work n finally i renounced. Consequently i sent them both (sounds like sendin' my children) for servicin' in spite of my busy schedules. Last week i received a call fr canon questionin' me wat was wrong with the camera n they cldn't find any fault. I went over 2 collect it n was kinda bewildered too as it was workin' perfectin' fine. Yesterday i received a call fr Dopod abt my mobile phone n was told the same thing again... they cldn't find any fault. I jus cldn't believe it... today i went over n my sms n clock on the phone both were perfectly fine too. I totally cldn't explain wat happened...!!!

Today bumped into Ade on my way home. Was really really happy to see her again!! :) I miss the Ade i used to know.... i dunno wat kinda person is she now... or in fact i didn't really know her tat well.... was jus my hallucination, tat Ade doesn't exist at all.

This friday i wun be able 2 go mps (our Macpherson Primary School :P). Kinda disappointed cos i miss the ppl. Sharon wans me 2 help her do some work. I explained 2 her abt friday (my favorite day of the week...) but she asserted tat it must be this friday evenin' as she wun be available after. Hmmm... ok.... of cos i'll help Sharon, she's a very gd friend of mine. :)

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Christmas 1st meetin'

Yesterday we had our 1st xmas meetin'. I was asked 2 be the MC but of cos i refused. I dun haf time 4 all the preparations n stuffs n Jiahui pointed out tat my mardarin cld be a problem, we got May instead. I was also asked to perform playin' the piano while the kids sing... haha. Kinda fun but i've quit piano (as in performin').... some of your should know. I told them i dun mind borrowin' my electric piano (yamaha) as long as the kids dun damage it. :P Eventually Shyang n i r helpin' Vincent on deco work... which is more suitable for me, dun need too much time involved.

Monday, November 05, 2007

sushi day

Met a friend 4 sushi lunch yesterday at Simei. She insisted 2 treat me bk 4 a movie. However i cldn't go as i needed 2 get bk hm 2 work, lotsa work... conf dateline is gettin' nearer. I finished one paper which Prof Sluzek had corrected some mistakes... so efficient of him. I went joggin' 2... not forgettin' 2 do alittle of workout every week.

I m beginnin' 2 feel frustrated in some mutual friends relationship which still cld spread animosity or jealousy between each another... why is tat so when we r all gd friends!!! Why can't he/she get involved... or joinin' us?!?!?? Why do ya think i treated he/she somehow better?!?!??? I really dunno wat to do in this kinda intricate situation when ppl accusin' me of this n tat. I exp tat in uni too when a grp of ppl accusin' me of treatin' Wing (who r detested by some of them) better. In fact, i'm a very simple-minded person towards friends. To me i m ok to mix or talk to anyone even tat person is scorned by everyone. I'll be very disappointed when my gd friends r accusin' me of treatin' somebody better.

Gaetan (one of my best friends in Aust) is comin' Singapore in Feb he said. :) ... really happy!!

Saturday, November 03, 2007

friday is over!

It is one day further fr the last time i saw G3.... n friday is over! Didn't get 2 see her yesterday... feelin' very tired. The lady came again yesterday, asked Florence abt me... but Florence was soo nice, she pretended she didn't know who she was referrin' to and assigned her to Shereen. :) But later, Mr Teo told me too she was askin' for me...oh gosh!!

Might be goin' taiwan in dec... hopefully wun clash wif the christmas party.
 
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